Drive Your Own Career

Brian (not a real person) was a successful accountant. He made a good living, had been promoted several times and worked for a respected firm. Yet Brian was unhappy and didn't know why. He had done everything he should have, at least according to the messages he'd received from his family. But by following those messages instead of listening to his inner voice, Brian strayed far from his true calling –– carpentry –– and was now miserably successful.

Impossible to Avoid

You get messages from your family from the day you're born. Some of these messages deal directly with work, including:

• The jobs that are considered appropriate based on gender or income potential.
  
• The circumstances under which it's appropriate to leave a job.
  
• The acceptable motivations for working.

Your family may have clearly stated some of these messages, or rules. For example:

• "Of course you'll go to medical school. Your father did."
  
• "It's not appropriate for a man to be a nurse."
  
• "You can't work for minimum wage!"

You may receive other messages subtly via comments about other people. For example:

• "Can you believe she quit because she was bored? What about her bills?"
  Message: It's more important to earn money than be happy in your job.
  
• "Mr. Smith sure is doing well. He owns his own business now!"
  Message: Entrepreneurship is good.
  
• "Boy, she's really making a difference in the world."
  Message: Social service is a worthy field.

These Messages Have an Effect

As you became an adult, you internalized some of the messages from your family. The little voice in your head that tells you to look both ways before crossing the street is the same one that "tsks" when you consider a career that is unacceptable based on the messages you've received from your family through the years. The conflict between these messages and the skills, interests and abilities you possess as an individual can cause lots of stress and, ultimately, lead to bad career decisions.

Let's look at Brian again. His family messages included:

• "A good job is a professional job, like a doctor, lawyer or accountant."
  
• "It's better to be at the top of the ladder than at the bottom."
  
• "Income is the most important consideration."
  
• "It's not acceptable for a member of our family to work with his hands for a living."

It's that last message that's causing him the most conflict. Because Brian is listening to –– and following –– messages that don't match his true desires, it is highly unlikely he will ever feel fulfilled as an accountant.

Get Back on Track

If you realize you've been following someone else's career rules, it's time to get back on track with your own. Follow these steps to get started:

• Recognize the Messages: Articulate the messages and rules you carry around in your head. Question every assumption and bias you have about jobs and work. This can be tricky, because assumptions are often invisible to us. Keep asking yourself why, as in, "Why can't a man be a nurse?"
  
• Evaluate the Messages You Uncover: Scrutinize every family message you recall. Is it something you value? Is it something you believe? Most importantly, is it a rule you want to keep?
  
• Keep the Good, Toss the Rest: Keep the messages that match your values and beliefs. They will serve as a guide in your job search and work life. Toss the ones that run counter to what you believe. They will only get in the way when you try to hear and follow your inner voice.
  
• Learn More About What You Believe: You will likely uncover some gray areas where you don't believe what your family taught you, but aren't sure what you should believe, either. This is a good time to do some self-assessment work.

By learning to listen to what your own voice is telling you, you'll be on track to find the career that's right for you.

Passion Can Drive Your Career

Whether it last happened today or 20 years ago, most of us have been hit with that pit-of-the-stomach, Monday-morning moment of questioning: Why do I work here? Is this all there is?

What's missing for many American workers is passion, a positive emotional connection to our work -- often our most energy-consuming pursuit. The good news is that with introspection, planning, action and support, you can redirect your career to incorporate what truly excites and invigorates you.

Passion Drives the Most Successful Careers

In the context of work, passion is more than a best-seller buzzword, according to Sally Hogshead, author of Radical Careering. "The word ‘passion' has a cheesy connotation, but you have to see it as a nonnegotiable element of your career success," she says. "In fact, if you're going to be your most successful, you have to be passionate."

To put the drive back into your career, you first must get back in touch with what energizes you. "Look back over the course of your life -- even back to when you were 12 years old -- and seek patterns in what you like about what you've done," says Lawler Kang, author of Passion at Work. "Try to come up with a high-level passion, even a mission. Then ask, ‘Does this job meet my personal mission?' whatever that mission is."

Your passion may take many forms: working with people, grappling with an organizational puzzle, telling stories or building that better mousetrap. It's wise to come up with more than one endeavor that energizes you, because some passions don't lend themselves easily to a career.

Put Passion into Your Work

Don't make the mistake of assuming that any work activity that touches on your passion will automatically gratify you. "Even if you're interested in golf, it's unlikely you'll stay interested in working in a golf store and selling equipment," says Julie Jansen, author of I Don't Know What I Want, But I Know It's Not This.

Suppose you've got the talent and decide you want to be a golf pro. For a successful candidacy, you need to lay out a plan that will help you put all the pieces together. "You've got to get some substantial stuff on your resume -- fill in the blanks, repackage yourself, get training," says Jansen. A reality check with professionals in your target occupation is key.

Inject Passion into Your Job Opportunistically

Of course, many of us don't have the time and money to undertake a total career change. Big changes typically come with big expenses. But some professionals develop creative ways to infuse their careers with a passion that has been a long-term avocation.

"A client of mine, an account executive at a global ad agency, is passionate about health," says William Arruda, a consultant with Reach Communications Consulting. "So she came up with several ways to inject her passion into the daily grind." The account executive worked with the on-site cafeteria to design healthful menus, led after-work yoga and kickboxing courses and gained a healthcare company as a client.

That's one way to serve up a career with a side of passion.